Digital Pope

A bolt of lightning - surely not a message from above - was photographed striking the lightning rod on the top St Peter's Basilica,

OMG! The Pope has resigned...how can that be? Popes don't just 'resign', its a bit like golfers who just grow old and loose their balls! 

Well, now it has happened what will the new Pope be like analogue or digital? 

Maybe we need a 'Digital Pope' who can bring the Catholic Church into the 21st Century... a scientist maybe?

This was interesting and fun to read today...take note Brian Cox!

To: The Vatican (HR Department)
Name: Dean Burnett
Date: 11-02-2013
Reference: Vacancy CCLXVI ('Pope')
CV: [Attached]

PERSONAL STATEMENT IN SUPPORT OF APPLICATION: See below
Dear Sir/Madam/Holy Ghost
I am very interested in applying for the recently announced vacancy for the position of pope. I am sure you've received many applications already, but I believe I would make an excellent candidate for the role as I could bring innovative new approaches and help increase diversity, which would have the effect of both motivating those involved in and enhancing the reputation of the organisation (i.e. The Catholic Church).

I have read the job description and although I admittedly do not meet all the specified essential criteria for the role (e.g. I do not regularly commune with God or any other unspecified deity) I feel that my strengths in other areas more than make up for my lack of direct experience.
Although I am not a practising member of the Catholic (or any other) Church, I am a qualified and enthusiastic scientist. I believe this makes me an ideal choice for the next pope, for a number of reasons. For example, I have had many jobs where it is compulsory to wear a white coat, and the wearing of long white garments appears to be the main duty of the pope. I also regularly lecture on the subject of neuroscience, so am extensively experienced at speaking in an unfamiliar language to rooms full of people who are struggling to stay awake, so it would be no trouble for me to offer Mass whenever required.

I am not a cardinal, but a recent check of my wallet reveals that I still have a membership cards for both GAME, Blockbuster Video and MVC, showing that I am clearly dedicated to declining institutions and have a robust if unrealistic belief in resurrection.
As an atheist scientist I cannot claim to be in regular contact with God per se, but I have regularly encountered professors with equivalent levels of power and influence who demand unquestioning obedience from those who serve them, so feel this has provided me with equivalent professional experience required for the position.
As a scientist pope, I could bring an element of rationalism and logic to the Catholic Church, which would better equip it to survive in more modern, enlightened times. I could provide numerous plausible-sounding theories as to the origins of the universe, life, evolution, human consciousness and any other area that the Church feels it should have influence over. Whereas most scientists require evidence and peer review before their theories can be accepted, my being the pope would mean I was infallible so I wouldn't have to go through this process; the simple act of me saying it would mean it is accepted by many as fact. This is a privilege enjoyed by only a few scientists, and one I definitely wouldn't abuse, scouts honour!

I have performed a number of miracles in recent years. For example, I have managed to sustain a career in science in present circumstances, despite having very few notable publications to my name and a disastrous history of high-profile embarrassments.
I have managed to remain in my post despite these numerous blunders, so I would be able to bring this experience to my duties as pope. I can also turn water into wine, which is viewed as more of a "classic" miracle. It takes some time as it involves me pouring the water onto grapevines before growing, picking, sorting, crushing, fermenting, maturing, bottling and selling. But overall, it's definitely water being turned into wine. With Science! (Unless that doesn't count as a miracle, in which case it's clearly magic).

I am not presently celibate, but as a teenager who was a big science fan with terrible acne, I am very familiar with the concept. I am also not a homosexual, as that would obviously exclude me from the role (NB. In the interests of transparency, I did once suck a penis, but I didn't inhale so it doesn't count). At the last count, I also have the required number of testicles to be pope (at least two). I also have experience with covering up crimes.

I believe these qualities and more make me an ideal candidate for the position, so I hope you will consider my application seriously. I realise the vacancy is somewhat above my pay grade, but I am looking for a higher paying position as I need money to provide for my family … I mean buy condoms … I mean jewels.
I look forward to hearing from you.
Vestrum fideliter

Dean Burnett

BETT 2013

BETT 2013 has just finished. Each year in London there is a huge exhibition of Educational Technology...ICT for Schools. I have always avoided going to this monster 'sell, sell, sell' event and every year it gets bigger. OK...last year I got a free mug from 'Education City' from a friend who went. It was fun when I read this, comparing BETT with IKEA. I'm sure that if I went I would react in the same way!

"I don’t like IKEA. I’ll tell you why. It is because of what I call ‘IKEA Fear’. The symptoms of IKEA Fear are a mounting sense of disquiet that commences the minute I pass through the large revolving doors. This disquiet worsens progressively as I meander first through immaculate living rooms, on through offices, bedrooms and kitchens until it becomes something visceral within my chest and stomach, usually around the time I reach the carpet, curtains and cushions – urging me to run screaming from the building clutching at my hair.
I have contemplated this feeling and the possible reasons for it. I have a theory based upon nothing other than my own tenuous guesses. I think my problem may possibly be similar to conditions such as agoraphobia or claustrophobia, and here are a couple of exacerbating factors:
• There is a disorientating absence of any reference to the outside world. If you are lucky, you might glimpse a rectangle of far-off, semi-industrial car-park through a distant fire door (the location of which is noted in the event of a panic-induced exit in due course).
• There is a disturbing juxtaposing of comfy, soft, homely environments in which you can sit and imagine oneself in the bosom of family relaxing after or during a meal… until you look up and witness the horrific, industrial tangle of ducting and steel. I don’t mind telling you that this contrast messes with my head.

Now, on to the BETT Show 2013. This year, it relocated from Olympia to Excel- a move I welcomed initially as it certainly improved accessibility for me. This welcome feeling was short-lived. On arrival at Excel, I attempted to feel upbeat and optimistic but that familiar disquiet, the IKEA Fear, started to creep up on me. I apologise to those friends of mine whom I encountered on that first morning, my brow knitted and jaw slightly tensed. I put on a brave face and greeted you enthusiastically but I wasn’t quite myself. Walking the (seemingly) mile-long boulevards, snickets and ginnels of the exhibition space, my anxiety mounted until I had to make a swift exit. David Mitchell and Julia Skinner were fortunately on hand to scoop me up as I composed myself over some lunch with them.
I struggled throughout the two and a bit days at the show. My misery was mitigated only by the wonderful encounters I had with lovely people. The social, the teachmeet, the laughs and the learning mean that I won’t be boycotting in future. I will take the rough with the smooth.
I miss Olympia. I miss the quirkiness, the characterful architecture, the nooks and crannies, the expanse of sky spread out above. I also miss the opportunities for out-of-body elevations to the balcony for welcome, reorienting breathers during which one could see the layout, establish the landmarks or spot a friend to pursue.
Oh, and I didn’t even see anything especially exciting or innovative in those long corridors of anxiety. Next year, I will dedicate myself to establishing quick exit routes whilst also seeking out people – after all, it is them that make a visit to BETT worthwhile."

FDK Multi Palm IV

Today I was playing about with a Multi Palm IV 70cm FM handheld. I have had this little rig in my possession for years now hidden in the attic along with lots of other 'junk' from the olden days.
This little handheld came out around 1979 and was ahead of it's time. I remember trying to build a transverter for 70cms then and it was difficult to build and tune up. The Multi Palm was small, very compact and stable. It was crystal controlled with a built in shift and tone burst for repeaters. Today I connected a 12v PSU and it worked fine. I could hear GB3CR repeater as good as my new Baofeng handheld.
Inside are a bank of small nicads, which don't seem to work any more. The rig gives an output power of 1 watt on 70cms.

I took the back off to remind myself of the analogue electronics inside, remember, there was nothing digital then. A lot of stuff packed into a small space! I wonder if you can still buy the packs of nicad batteries? Back in 1979 Birkett's would sell packs like this at some of the radio rallies dead cheap.

If you lift up the main board you will find the bank of six crystals which can be changed for the particular channels that you want. The ones fitted at the moment are: RB2, RB4, RB6, SU8, RB10, SU20.

Block Diagram of the FDK Multi Palm IV (Click to enlarge)

Circuit Diagram of the FDK Multi Palm IV (Click to enlarge)

HMV

What is happening to the world of retail?

Soon there will be no stores at all left in our town centre, just pound shops, mobile phone shops, pawn shops and banks!

I remember the days of shopping in Bolton where you could spend all day there browsing round the shops. I loved the record shops! Bulloughs on Knowsley Street, the Co-op on Bridge Street and later Russells, Our Price, WH Smith and Andy's Records.
I find it hard to pay money for something that I cannot hold in my hand and 'keep'. Vinyl LPs with their covers are something that you saved up for and treasured, often reading the sleeves and looking at the pictures while you listened to them. CD's gave us quality without the crackles and scratches, but they sort of took away the feel of a Vinyl album.

Now it is digital, but lets stop here....MP3???  Where is the audio quality in that?
You pay for a digital download to listen on your computer or phone in audio quality on parr with Medium Wave Radio!  What has happened to the high quality Stereo Amps and Speakers?  How many people are listening to their digital downloads on Rotel Amps and Wharfdale Speakers?
People don't seem to have the time anymore for 'quality' listening, life is too fast, music on the go. We seem to be going back in time in the analogue world to the time when we listened to music on a 'record player' with a tinny speaker. In those days we strived for better 'quality' audio production. Now we have it we are going in reverse!

Technology has shot itself in the foot!

Now HMV the last remaining music store is poised to shut, soon CD's will be a thing of the past and we will be doomed to the digital downloads stored in the 'clouds' of digital technology.

Latest news...now Blockbuster have joined the insolvency club!
Members now include: Woolworths, Game, Comet, Jessops, HMV, Blockbuster...I wonder who is next to join?

Baofeng UV-5R Dual Band Radio

When I got one of these for Christmas I was pleasantly suprised!
I have never seen or held one of these before, but thinking about how cheap it is selling at the moment and made in China, I wasn't sure what to expect. I had read some good reviews on the internet.

I was amazed when I opened the box and assembled this little beauty. Not plasticy and light, but solid and feels more like a £200 radio not one that costs less than £50! The radio covers 144Mhz and also 432Mhz FM with either frequencies or channels. The dual display is clear and easy to read and the audio is powerful. The Baofeng is easy to use of you are just scanning through the bands, a bit like 'tuning high to low' on 144Mhz (go on...who remembers that?)

Programming is another matter...you can programme channels from the keypad, but with repeaters and tones etc..it is a bit of a pain. I bought a programming cable and downloaded the Baofeng software. The software is pretty straightforward, but the drivers for the cable are a total nusance!
It seems that all the cables are cheap and nasty and the drivers are not compatable with any computers. I got mine from Amazon, at first I thought it was working, but now my computers don't even recognise the cable despite numerous versions of the drivers.

On 432Mhz I have been listening to the GB3CR repeater with just the rubber duck antenna and reception is fine. What I don't understand is why I can't hear anything on my base station vertical, I bought a F to BNC adaptor (which works) but even though I can hear stations at S9+ on 144Mhz with my FT 817, I can't hear anything at all on the Baofeng with the same antenna...very strange! I'm still investigating that one!

I really like this this radio, it even talks to you! I'm not too bothered about programming, I would rather just scan around. It would be nice to to access some local repeaters, but i'm working on it!

Here is a great site that explains everything about using the Baofeng:

http://www.miklor.com/uv5r/

Thunderbirds are go!

Here are some of my Christmas presents, the famous Thunderbirds vehicles!

I always wanted these dicast models, but could never find them, but I found these like new on ebay.

It is sad to hear today that Gerry Anderson has died aged 83.

I loved to watch Thunderbirds when I was at school and before that Fireball XL5. When I was only 4 years old I remember watching 'Four Feather Falls' and 'Sparky'. Gerry Anderson had some amazing innovative ideas. He harnessed the analogue technology of the times and brought puppets to life. I actually believed that Steve Zodiac and Venus were real when I was small.
Although I watched every episode of Thunderbirds, including the first one, I also have the DVD set and watch it quite a lot. I guess it looks a bit dated now, but at the time it was state of the art!
Did you know that the Tracey Brothers in Thunderbirds Scott, Virgil, Alan, Gordon and John were all named after astronauts?

G8NVW

Photo of myself with Alban G8NVW on the left at the Belle-Vue Convention around 1975 

 

I just heard today about Alban G8NVW who became silent key on Saturday. I haven't seen Alban for a number of years or worked him on the radio. Alban was an enthusiastic member of the Bolton and District Amateur Radio Society back in the late 70's and 80's. Alban was just a teen then, but became licenced and could be heard on 2m in those days. Only recently, I put on a photo of Alban along with other members sent to me by Ross G6GVI when we were talking about the old G8WY callsign being used again. The last time I spoke with Alban he worked as a technician at Salford University. A sad loss, but fondly remembered.